Epistolary Archives
by MissLP
Summary: A series of notes, letters and diary entries written by the CID team. Just imagine what would happen if someone happened to find them...! T for now.
1. 7th September, 1983

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own _Ashes to Ashes_ or the characters featured within it. Unfortunately...

Hello everybody! I'd just like to apologise for my rather long absence. School work, A levels, uni and various other things have taken over my life recently, and I've finally got a little bit more time to write - hooray! I am so sorry for the lack of updates; I promise my other fics (particularly Modern Love) will be updated soon.

However, I have come up with this. I'm calling it _Epistolary Archives;_ I was looking up narrative voices (I know, I'm a bit of a geek when it comes to things like this) and I stumbled upon 'Epistolary voice' - a story written through letters, diary entries notes etc. This got the ball rolling so I thought I'd give it a try! I hope you enjoy :)

**Miss LP X**

* * *

><p>7TH SEPTEMBER, 1983.<p>

Oi, Bolly Kecks.

I figured the kitchen table was a good place for you to find this, because you are no doubt still pissed as a fart.

Ta muchly for the shit house rubbish last night – went down a treat. Hope you didn't make too much of a mess in your bathroom. It was like watching something from The Exorcist. Not nice.

Also, ta for your shit sofa. The blanket did compensate. But not much.

See you at nine. Pronto.

The Guv.

* * *

><p><em>Guv,<em>

_Thank you for your kind, considerate actions. I, too, thought of you whilst placing this in an obvious place. The desk works wonders, I find, mainly because you actually do very little work on it, therefore rendering this note very obvious on the lonely surface._

_I'm glad you enjoyed the 'shit house rubbish'. I always find it makes slightly awkward social situations that little bit easier. (I might add that I evidently mean Keats. Not you. Never you. At all. Ever. Just for clarification...obviously. Ha.) Apologies for the projectile vomiting incident. I can't say that was my finest moment, but then again, I'm sure I can make up for that another time. And no, don't go getting any ideas._

_I suppose you'll also be wanting compensation for my 'shit sofa' and the blanket that wasn't up to your standards. Next time, I'm sure the floor will be more than happy to accommodate your good self._

_See you in Luigi's later...unless Keats happens to slime over and drag us into some shitty D&C case. Joy of joys._

_Bolly. X_

* * *

><p>Alex,<p>

I hope you don't mind me leaving this on your desk, but you appeared to leave early this evening before I got the chance to speak to you properly.

D&C have asked me just to do a little review on the department, and I was wondering whether you would be willing to help? Nothing serious, just a little check up on procedures etc.

Speak soon.

Jim.


	2. 8th September, 1983

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own _Ashes to Ashes_.

I'm on a roll! Here is chapter two. Thank you for all the positive feedback so far! :)

**Miss LP** X

* * *

><p>8TH SEPTEMBER, 1983.<p>

_Guv,_

_Keats left a note for me after we'd left. (Told you he'd slime – do you think he's cottoned on to the fact we really don't like D&C?) Something about helping him to review the department? I don't know. Just wanted to give you the heads up. Can't say I'm that enthused to be honest. I suppose if I help, it'll set up a good image for everyone? Oh, I don't know. Your call._

_Hope the floor was alright last night. Shame really, I did offer you the bed, but you, being the gentleman you are, refused...unless I was in there with you. I did tell you to not get any ideas..._

_What's the latest on the Trackerby case? Lots of loose ends to be tied, methinks._

_Bolly. X_

* * *

><p>Bolls,<p>

The snooping pencil-necked twat. I'll snap him in half before he goes anywhere near my bloody department, the little shit. You have got a fair point though, Bolls. By the way he was looking at you the other night, I'm sure little James would be delighted to have your arse on his side. Not like me to say this, but turn him down gently – the 'good image' idea is...well, good. Just be your posh, tarty self and he'll be out quicker than a teenager dumping his load in a street full of poofs.

Floor was delightful. Rug added extra comfort, thanks for that. Well, I couldn't let you give up the bed, I'm far too nice. Ideas? Piss off, Bolly, I had no ideas whatsoever.

Trackerby? God, tricky little bugger of a case. Diane Trackerby was identified by the mother, poor cow. Need to hunt down weapon and get the murderer's MO. Up for doing a group session? Not like that, cheeky tart.

The Guv.

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><p><em>D.C.I Keats,<em>

_So sorry I missed you yesterday. Finished a case early and the boys wanted their lunch!_

_I would help, Jim, but this new case we've been landed with is a difficult one, and needs all hands on deck to solve. It's not a nice one (they rarely ever are), so I'm afraid I won't be able to help you with the review. However, I'm sure you're more than capable!_

_Need anything else, just let me know._

_D.I Drake._

* * *

><p>D.C.I Hunt,<p>

I suggest you don't encourage your officers to go against their will. I establish that D.I Drake has informed you of my little review? Nothing to worry about. Just procedure. For the moment.

I don't like appearing to be the bad guy, Gene. Neither do you, I imagine. So, despite the hatred I harbour for this department, I think being civil is the best way to get through this, yeah?

See you in Luigi's.

D.C.I Keats.

* * *

><p><em>Ray, Chris, Shaz, Poirot, Terry, and Bammo,<em>

_The Guv has asked me to do a group session with you all on the Trackerby case. I need you all to be in tomorrow at 9am sharp. Bring pens and paper._

_Thank you! See you bright and early tomorrow._

_Alex._

* * *

><p>Bolly,<p>

Dear God, stop bloody working on Trackerby for a couple of hours and come to Luigi's. Well, not Luigi's – Keats is there. I mean, we could pinch a bottle or two of wine off Luigi and head upstairs? To your flat, obviously. Nothing funny.

The Guv X


	3. 9th September, 1983

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own _Ashes to Ashes_ or any of the characters featured within it.

Hello again! I'm on a bit of a roll with this one; I'm finding it so easy to write, because I'm able to really get into it :P Like I said, the other fics will be updated soon, but this is just to fill in the gaps whilst I try to work off this horrible writer's block...

Thank you for all the positive feedback I've been receiving! Nothing makes me happier than seeing reviews, so thank you so much for your lovely comments and support.

Enjoy chapter 3! No doubt I'll start writing chapter 4 now haha.

**Miss LP X**

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><p>9TH SEPTEMBER, 1983<p>

_Ma'am,_

_I don't mean to talk out of turn, but I was just wondering where you were last night? The Guv wasn't there either. I missed having another woman to chat to, I was really outnumbered by the men!_

_Shaz X_

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><p>Oi, Chris,<p>

D'ya think the Guv got lucky? Him and Drakey weren't at Luigi's last night and they're a bit late this morning...!

If this is true, you owe me a tenner.

Raymondo

* * *

><p>D.C.I Hunt,<p>

You weren't at Luigi's last night. I was so looking forward to a couple of whiskeys.

Alex wasn't there either...I'd be careful if I were you. Rumours are flying.

D.C.I Keats

* * *

><p>Bolly Knickers,<p>

Ta, again, for last night. I really should start paying you some sort of rent. Then again, your hospitality is pretty shite, plus I'm a colleague/friend, therefore I constitute the rules of 'stay but no pay'.

D.C.I Arse-Twat noticed we weren't there last night. Think he was jealous. Of you, obviously, because you got to spend some more time with moi.

Anyway, Trackerby case – you'd better start on this group session...

Gene X

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><p><em>Shaz,<em>

_I'm so sorry I wasn't there! I wanted to go straight up, wasn't feeling great. (I'll explain in person; something to do with a certain D.C.I who doesn't particularly enthuse me...!) You'd better be up for Luigi's tonight, I have something rather nice to tell you!_

_Oh, and make sure the boys are ready for the group brainstorm in a bit. I know I was late (blah blah blah, I'm allowed to not be on time for once) so tell them I expect them ready in the next 15/20 minutes._

_Alex X_

* * *

><p>Raymondo,<p>

The Guv and Drake having a...'thing' is like watching your parents shagging. Definitely not.

Chris

* * *

><p>Keats,<p>

If you must know, I had other, private business to discuss with D.I Drake. Something that I'd honestly love to share, but must remain confidential for professional reasons.

D.C.I Hunt

* * *

><p><em>Ray &amp; Chris,<em>

_Ma'am just left me a note explaining her absence. She apparently 'wasn't feeling great'. If that isn't a cover-up for a secret liaison, I don't know what is!_

_Shaz X_

* * *

><p>Ray + Shaz,<p>

What's a liaison?

Chris


End file.
